"Well folks, time to get off the gravy train."

A couple of weeks ago my life changed. It hasn't fully sunk in yet. I worked for that company for 12 years. My entire adult career. This is so fresh it still feels like a vacation.

My position was eliminated. And it's perfect, because for a month prior to that I'd been feeling burned out and ready to move on. The problem, as always, was the paycheck. That paycheck let me pretty much do whatever I wanted. I live pretty simply, but didn't have to look at prices for anything and never felt stressed. I could drink and eat what I wanted and buy things on a whim that I might never use... Like a wood chipper, or a bamboo splitter or a kreg pocket jig.

A month ago, I also bought a new bus. Well. New to me. It has some electrical issues, due to one of the prior owners getting freaky with wiring he didn't understand. It's currently less driveable than when I bought it, but I'm excited about the potential. The main problem now being that I have no income.

After almost 12 years, I've got almost 6 months of severance. I'm 39 years old and I feel like I'm starting again. Like I'm just out of college. Full-on Millennial Mid-Life Crisis.

I keep having these flashbacks to 2008 when I couldn't find a job for months. I'd just bought this house on a mortgage they shouldn't have given me. I was a temp worker and that job went away - as temp jobs do. So I subsisted eating potatoes and watching the Godfather all day. This was back when dvds were still a thing and I only had a handful of options. In hindsight, it wasn't the best choice. I was in a weird place.

In reality, this isn't at all like that. This is more like a sabbatical. I have some monetary security, for now. I have time to understand what I need to do to make money doing something else. I have all the right elements and background. It's just about perfect.

I've spent the past year travelling the US, going to festivals on the weekends. Now I know festivals. I know how to live on the road. I know how to make road friends and what kinds of friends are really out there. I know how to find work from the friends I've made. I know what mountains and flowers and plains and cities and towns look like, across this beautiful country. I have 95% of an art degree from 20 years ago and a lot of old ideas. I have a childhood of art festivals and basic carpentry.

I'm primed and ready to be an artist. I just have to do it. So this is me now. I bought one more ridiculous thing with my severance package money. A 40w diode laser. My new art is gonna be mixed media with a laser. I've realized the art I like best is layers of stuff that is complicated and intertwined. It's not just paint. It's tactile. It's wood, leather, fabric, patterns, softness and rust.

This is new territory for me. I was only ever taught to paint and draw. For the past 12 years I've been an IT analyst, implementing Agile, trying to teach others how to think bigger than the people who report to them or the people they report to. Now it's time for me to blend all of that history into art that resonates. I want to resonate with coffee baristas, corporate executives, farmers, plumbers, and musicians. I want my art to be human. To show humanity, to show nature, to bring an appreciation for what is in the world.